Has there ever been a definitive guide written on parenting? Something set in stone parents can turn to for answers to solve the most vexing parenting problems. I guess the difficulty with a bible like parenting source is that there are so many different styles of parenting that it would be impossible to satisfy every style. For starters, authoritative parenting is said to encourage adolescents to learn to become independent. But how would this sit with a couple following the values of christian parenting? Giving a child a degree of free reign such as a little verbal give and take probably wouldn't sit too well with the strong christian parenting tradition. Then we could throw family parenting into the mix, or baby parenting.
In recent times, co parenting has been added to the list and it is something that makes a whole lot of sense. Basically, co parenting is about putting the child's best interests first when two parents are going through divorce. You've often heard it said; it's the child or children who suffer the most during divorce. With co parenting, parents are encouraged to stop the one upmanship on each other and make the separation process as smooth as humanly possible.The child is never put in the middle of two waring factions and his/her relationship with either parent is encouraged.
You can appreciate though that this is not easily achieved because of the nature of divorce and the fine line between love and hate but in the instances where co parenting has been successfully applied, those children are said to have suffered very few traumatic experiences. I was brought up with what I now term as a successful mix of different parenting values. Looking back, the application of some of the principles of both authoritative parenting and christian parenting for mine, worked wonders.
Thank goodness I never had to experience the co parenting factor as a child. Although as an adult, it was a different situation. But that is another story. So maybe a little mix'n'match of the different parenting values could be something we should explore. Combining good discipline practice with a little independece encouragement.
As far as baby parenting is concerned I well remember my early experience as a father. Despite all the preparation before my son was born and all the wonderful advice from well meaning friends and relatives, in the end, I can safely say it was a role I eventually grew into. There was no step-by-step instruction manual I had to follow. It was almost a case of "the child maketh the parent." Think about that for a moment.
Dean Caporella is a broadcaster and parent fascinated by the many categories parents are lumped into nowadays. For parenting news and reviews vist: www.parentinginfoline.com
